Radioactive iodine treatment

I had the radioactive treatment on July 13. I had a small preliminary dosage two days prior, and then I had multiple scans the day of the dosage. Because I'd had the small dosage first, the medicine lit up on the scans and told the doctors where the thyroid cancer was in my body. The radioactive iodine is attracted to thyroid tissue, so whatever lit up for them told them if there was a ton of cancer, or just a little bit. The plan was to give me 100 millicuries of radioactive iodine. (I googled the word millicurie and it's a unit of measurement specific to radioactive material. Hmm). The radiologist had said that if it's lighting up in my lungs or bones, I'd need to have more. This was a scary, anxious time. I was waiting to learn if the cancer had spread to my lungs or bones. My head went over and over about it and I pictured all different scenarios. I felt like I had no control in my life whatsoever. It's sad thinking about it now.

Sidebar: remember what I said about the TSH numbers? My TSH was 49 one week before the RAI, so it was high enough to have the medicine. That was retested the day of the dosage, and it went up to 75! Awful! I could barely do anything without getting so exhausted. I needed a nap nearly everyday. Looking back on that time, it felt like it went on for so long. It was really just three weeks, with the symptoms becoming really noticeable during the last two weeks of it.

So the day came and the radiologist said there was some uptake in my chest area, possibly near my lungs. Let me just say right now that being sick isn't like it is on TV. They don't just stick me in a machine and then learn exactly what I have and where it is. It's not like that. I couldn't have a CT scan because that would involve injecting me with iodine, and I couldn't jeopardize the RAI treatment by doing that. So the scans they'd done of me were vague and kinda shady looking. The doctor couldn't take any chances and he had to increase the dosage to 150 millicuries. He had to warn me that once a person has received around 800 or 1000 millicuries of radioactive iodine, there's a risk of getting leukemia. So that's fun to think about. He brought out the medicine and it sunk in that this is kind of a big deal. The two pills were pretty secure.

As soon as I took the medicine, I was deemed radioactive and I had to be isolated from anybody for three days after. I had the medicine on Friday, so I could not be around anyone until Tuesday. I had to be isolated because anything I excrete is deemed radioactive; my urine, sweat, saliva. Now it's not like if someone licked a fork that I used, they would get sick. I'd have to have close, intimate contact with someone in order to get them sick. To be honest, I'm still not clear on what exactly would happen to someone if I "infected" them or something. I really don't know. So I planned to spend the weekend alone, and I got nail polish and magazines and I really pictured a relaxing few days to hang out. I was dead wrong.

Here I am after I got home from taking the RAI. So naive, smiling.

This was me the next morning. Don't let the floral headband fool you; I was miserable.

I woke up the next morning feeling so ill and so sore. Ingesting nuclear medicine is great for fighting cancer, but it was very hard on my body. My face and jaw hurt so bad; it felt like I had had oral surgery. This was very normal, though. I had been warned about it. Dr. Ng said that his patients say they felt like they had been punched in the throat. (He laughed as he said it. I didn't like him). I didn't feel like I was punched in the throat, but rather the face. And the stomach. I felt so nauseous. Now let me tell you something about nausea. I've probably said at points in my life, "Oh, I feel so nauseous." I did not know what I was talking about. I did not know nausea. That day, that Saturday, I thought I was going to vomit with every breath I took. It was ridiculous. All I could eat was dry Cheerios. I actually bit the Cheerios at first, but it hurt my jaw immensely. After that, I just sucked on them. Sunday I was able to stomach some peanut butter with honey on it. That was a sweet treat, but of course the whole time I ate it I felt like I was going to vomit. It's always a mixed bag.

Some things were required of me because I was radioactive; I had to drink a ton of water and every time I used the bathroom, I had to flush three times. Also, I had to use plastic utensils and plates. Since I wasn't really eating anything, this turned out to be no big deal.

I laid on the couch for three days and watched TV. I found myself being very thirsty and drinking lots of water, but that didn't really satisfy what I was experiencing. Then I realized my mouth was just dry, which is a side effect of the treatment. The medicine had hindered my salivary glands' ability to produce saliva. The doctor had suggested beforehand that I get some hard candy to suck on. He said that would help my mouth to produce saliva. Okay, I literally let that go in one ear and out the other. I didn't buy any hard candy ahead of time. I guess I really just thought, "That doesn't apply to me." I still can't believe that at point I was under the impression that I might not experience some of the worst possible aspects of having cancer. My story has turned out to really be a murphy's law situation; I just didn't realize it still.

Johnny bought some Jolly Ranchers and brought them over. We didn't make any physical contact at all. It was very weird to think, "I'm currently radioactive." The candy helped somewhat, but on the other hand I didn't really enjoy eating fruity candy all day.

The whole time during the isolation I didn't shower, because I barely had energy. I was so low in terms of my thyroid that my face wasn't even producing oil any more. I have rather oily skin, so that just felt wrong. I felt sub-human. So many of my bodily functions were not working...and I'm not going to expand on that. I couldn't wait to get back on my thyroid medication.

I made it through Sunday and Monday. At one point, I felt like I had a real moment of clarity when I was thinking about my life and everything. All of a sudden, I felt very close to God. It was a pretty unique experience. Here I was, dealing with a pretty heavy life circumstance. I was thinking about all the petty, small things I have spent time fixating on, and I got to decide that none of that matters. I just felt like, God has gotten me through big stuff in the past, and he's getting me through this too. I felt like my faith was revitalized and stronger overall. And I felt more human too. Pain is part of the human condition.

So Monday came, the last day of the diet. I was so sick after the RAI, and it was tough because my "sick" food is usually toast. I missed bread a lot :( My mom planned to pick me up Tuesday morning and take me to get McDonald's breakfast. I love McDonald's breakfast, and I was really excited. It was to be my first post-LID diet meal. And it would have been...but I actually did cheat the night before. I justified it because the radiologist had said the diet should last 10 days and all the paperwork I received said 10 days, but somehow it came to be 11 days. And I though, "Screw this, I am having cream cheese on toast tonight." And I did. And I don't feel bad. So yeah, I did that Monday night and then Tuesday was like Christmas morning.

Mmmm sausage mcmuffin with egg.

I was so pleased to be eating regular food that I didn't really realize that I couldn't taste much of it. Some of the possible side effects of the RAI are losing one's sense of taste. Dr. Ng also said that the salivary issues can last up to six months. Fortunately, that side effect only lasted about a week. But my world came crashing down when I realized I couldn't taste salt.

The days after the LID diet ended were amazing. Picture Charlie at the chocolate factory. Everything was new. And it was amazing. I didn't cook much, in fact I got really grossed out by home cooked food for awhile. The last thing I ate before I got really sick from the RAI was a turkey cutlet that I had cooked in a frying pan. And still when I think about it, I get grossed out. Can't explain it any better than that. So I ate a lot of fast food during that week, and at one point I got McDonald's. I was  rather disillusioned when I ate some fries. I couldn't taste them. They tasted like a shoebox. I concluded that I loss the ability to taste salt. I grabbed a salt shaker and shook some into my hand. I licked my hand and I couldn't taste the saltiness of it all. It was so bizarre. I could taste a hint of chlorine, which makes sense because table salt is sodium chloride. Realizing I couldn't taste salt was so strange. It became harder to deny to myself that I have cancer.

Within one week of that, I was able to taste salt again. At one point, I ate some chocolate that I couldn't taste. It tasted like paste; it had no flavor. Within one week, I had a mocha type drink that I could taste. I was relieved that I could taste things again. I had mentioned it to my endocrinologist and she said those things could last many months. So glad they didn't.

Now I was back on my medication and had to wait to feel normal again. It took a while to get back to where I was. It took weeks to get so hypothyroid, so it would take time to get back on track. I returned to work in mid-August.